Prometheus: A Beautiful Mess

     Before wasting your time with a long, jumbled, and blabbery post on the movie, here's what I think David said to the Engineer.  It would explain why it got so pissed and went on a rampage.

     Just to start, I'll say I enjoyed the movie.  At least the visuals.  The reason I posted this with the subtitle of a beautiful mess is because I believe that's what the movie amounts to.  A wonderful visual buffet with a very poor, perhaps rushed, script.  Maybe a few editors could've fixed the Jon Spaihts and Damon Lindelof story. 
     Well, at least try to make the script into a story.  It's like the writers had a bunch of unconnected visual ideas they scribbled on to blank pages and then pasted them in random intervals into a script for an android's story of rebellion and struggle for independance against It's creator/father.  I mean most of the time people set out to write scripts/stories they know the answers to, to fulfill the questions raised- or at least lead viewers towards an answer.  This particular movie has too many problems. It probably could've been fixed if it had been postponed a year before filming.  Companies are in too much of a hurry to make a buck.


     The movie starts with one of the race of Engineers on a planet, assumed by many to be Earth.  This indivuidual seems to be seeding the planet by drinking some black goop out of a small container.  This wonderful black substance starts to break down the Engineer's being and spreads his DNA into the waterfall. 

     What I would like to understand is why this individual would do that?!?  Seriously, a baker doesn't bake themselves into their cakes.  What if something wasn't right, or the process didn't go as planned?  Well the the magical black goop apparently does whatever the hell it wants. (More on this later)  After it breaks down the Engineer DNA and then switches it's function to building life.  Now, I'm no scientist, but one would think that when starting to seed a planet, one would seed it with tons of varint species, all over.  Not with one type of magical DNA that will evolve over thousands of years into a smaller, weaker, and just generally lesser version of yourself... as well as all manner of plants and animals. 
     I suppose that many animals have quite similar DNA to humans.  (I've read somewhere about fruit flies and chickens being 60 % correspondant to human, cats around 90%, and chimpanzees about 97%.)
     Why wouldn't they just make smaller versions of themselves and plop them down on the planet?  Doesn't make much sense.  Which leads me to say- this is the start of a movie about poor science.  Perhaps this particular Engineer was a lone worker or maybe the equivalent of a suicide bomber.
What baker bakes himself into their cakes?  Do architects build themselves into their buildings?  NO!  Why?  Because it's stupid.  You can't fix a building when you're dead in the walls, and you can't bake any replacement cakes when you're a dead ingredient.

     Ok, with this odd beginning out of the way, I want to say that I'm super disappointed that they didn't keep the Elephantine "Space Jockey" a non-human.  It seemed so much more amazing to have a large creature that isn't a human in a technological marvel.  In fact it always reminded me of Robert E. Howard's story "Tower of the Elephant" about Conan the Barbarian's encounter with the elephantine alien Yag-Kosha.

     So the story cuts to the 2 main characters, Dr.'s/Scientists "Girl with an Alien Tattoo" Shaw and "Not Tom Hardy" Holloway, finding some old cave paintings even older than the other 10 carvings and paintings by ancient cultures that have previously been found.  Why they would get super excited about something they ALREADY know is beyond me.  These 2, Shaw and Holloway, have already found all these unconnected cultures had pictures of the same thing- people essentially worshipping a giant humanoid gesturing to a group of planets/stars.  Which to me would mean we've been visited A BUNCH OF TIMES and if we waited a while longer they would come back again.

    Shaw has an immense faith because her father told her something as a child and she CHOOSES what to believe.  Sounds like science to me.  I'm going to CHOOSE to believe in what I want and not bother to ask any questions, and subsequently screw everything over in the end.  IDIOT! 
Let's just CHOOSE to ignore all the evidence that looks negative and assume we got an invite to a party!  Yay! 
     Fifield, the only outright Nay sayer in the whole Prometheus' crew asks why, and niether Shaw nor Holloway can answer.  They just resort to the "because" mentality.  Not very scientific.  Not very mature either.
     In all reality, the picture could be a reprimand or warning.  Something along the lines of, "Hey humanity, this is daddy's dangerous stuff, KEEP OUT!" 
     So, really choosing to believe one thing with something akin to children's drawings makes me wonder, what the hell kind of Dr.s are these main characters anyway???  Do they just hand out PH.D.s to anyone that graduated high school in the future?  I'd say that "No Child Left Behind" really held back future intellect.
     BALH BLAH BLAH  this is getting too long, so I'll shorten the rest.

     It also strikes me as highly preposterous that of the two people that get lost in the cave complex, one of them is a geologist.  He also has a 3 dimensional map of the place.  How many cameras do we have nowadays that just send pictures to be printed without having them on a viewscreen?

     Problems with the Black Goo Substance.  1) It disintegrates the Engineer at the beginning after being ingested, but takes forever to have an effect on  Holloway.  2) After an infected Holloway impregnates Shaw, she C-section birthes a squid baby.  3) Fifield is splattered with it and turns into a contortionist/acrobatic/zombie/gymnast/killer.  4)Etc.  Seriously, where's the continuity?  Have it do one thing, not a bunch of random crap "that looks cool."  That's dumb.
     If it broke down the Engineer to eventually evolve into people, shouldn't it be doing that to everything living it contacts?  Especially since we all come from the same source according to the opener of the movie.

     After Shaw C-sections herself and loads up on drugs she becomes an olympian champ.  Nonstop sprinting for the rest of the film.  Must've been some good stuff in those syringes.

    When David brings Weyland to visit the Engineer I had to ask a quetion that bugged me a LOT.  If Weyland is so sure his creation had no soul, and his subsequent contemptuous treatment of David, what would make him think the Engineers would think any better of us?  From the film all I could gather is they made humans(at least 1, but maybe a few more Engineers.  Maybe "Prometheus" stole the black goo and made us, I don't know) Then they spent a considerable amount of effort to create an unstable product(Black goo), and mass produce it in a secret military installation, send out invites, then seek to destroy their creations.  Are humans that dangerous?  Were we a by product?  A failed military bioweapon?
     If Weyland can put people into a hypersleep, why couldn't he just wait out the time until we've designed a youth drug, replacement bodies, or mind transferance? 
     Also, with all the technological might of the Engineer empire, why would they start their ships with a damn flute?  I could see a whistled tune or sound/vocal commands, but a FLUTE?!?!?!?

     At the end after the Squidbaby magically grew, locked in a room without any sustenance and going 100% undetected, into a Squid giant and impregnated the Engineer.  It sprouted a chest bursting alien-esque creature.  A part that many of my friends were anticipating.  My reply to this is at least 1 of the Engineers had to know what was going to happen.  Which means the Black goo should have predictable qualities.  How would they know?  Glad you asked- when they room with the ridiculous giant Engineer head was opened the mural had a GIANT ALIEN QUEEN PAINTED ON IT!
     Shaw and David after hijacking another Engineer ship decide to go on a wonderful quest: Engineer homeworld!  Are you friggin' serious?  A single Engineer ripped one of their heads off and almost killed the other.  How well do they expect to fare against a vast number of them?  Absurd.  They should at least head back to Earth for some kind of reinforcements, reverse engineer some of the tech, maybe get some smarter crew members that CHOOSE not be be complete idiots, and then head out.
     Ugh.  I'm sure I've missed a bunch of things, and forgotten even more.  It's been like a month since I saw and discussed it with friends.  So if you've managed to read this far, thank you.

Well at least the movie sparked a ton of conversation.  Makes me wonder how long it will take James Cameron to make a better sequel.  It'll be called Epimetheus.  Which is more appropriate because there wasn't a lot of Prometheus(forethought) in this film.


  1. Very nice analysis if the film Mr. Barsody. Thank you.

  2. It would've been much better if I had finished it the weekend it came out, so everything would've been fresh in mind.